Home again, home again...

It's Sunday night, and I'm recovering from another weekend of bliss.

Friday after work Phillip and his son, Kaleb, picked Makayla and I up from Memphis to spend the weekend with them in Ft. Campbell. I was really apprehensive at first about meeting Kaleb, and even more apprehensive to see how well Makayla and Kaleb would get along. As soon as they pulled up one of my fears was instantly squished! They pull up and after giving me a hug Phillip opens up the back door to his truck and lifts out a miniature version of himself, down to the same eyebrows! Makayla being the social butterfly she is comes running out the door, "My name is Makayla! What's your name little boy?" They hit it off IMMEDIATELY! It took him a few hours to come out of his shell with me, which is completely understandable! I knew that this was all going to be new to him so I didn't get too pushy, but by the end of the day on Sunday he was completely out of his shell!

The weekend was perfect, the weather was perfect, the kids got along perfect...it was too perfect! Saturday night as we sat in the backyard, Phillip on the grill, and the kids running around, I just couldn't help but think that I could definitely get use to this. I could see myself there, picturing the swing set we would buy and the pool, picturing Makayla's things in one of the bedrooms, taking trips to the PX and Commissary on the weekends. We even talked about getting a boat for trips to the river.

I finally got to experience the family that I've always wanted, and it has completely scared me to death! I'm scared of getting hurt again. Now that I've gotten a taste I'm hooked, like a drug, and I want more! I want more perfect weekends like this! One thing I've learned about drugs though, is no matter how good they make you feel they will hurt you! My head is screaming right now...."RUN! Run far and fast before you get hurt again!" But what if I'm finally getting what I've always wanted? What if my dreams are finally coming true? Is it worth risking the pain?